So, thanks to the WordPress Daily Prompt: Confess, here are my 5 confessions of 2017:
1. I’m not yet a grown up
Yes, I turned 30, my partner and I bought a house & got ourselves a puppy, but I don’t feel like a grown up yet. I’m not sure at what stage you start to feel like one but I’m not there. 2018 will present opportunities to become a human adult but for now, for the last few days of 2017, I’ll continue to prat about as normal.
2. I’m not satisfied with my diagnosis & am going to keep looking for answers
After seeing a psychologist & getting a wishy-washy response, I’m persisting. I know many of you might be thinking that the diagnosis isn’t everything. That may be true for you but not for me, not yet. I was a 32/50 for ASD but technically not Aspergers. But there are so many things I relate to, especially in this blog post by Everyday Aspie.
3. I’ve learned a lot from so many of you so thank you
I’ve been better at reading blogs in the tags they I’m interested in & realised there are so many talented & honest people around. Your beautiful writing & words are amazing to see & I salute you all. Reading your blogs, I’m learning too 🙂
4. I feel rejected by my Dad but I’m working on getting through it
A long, boring 30-year old story of someone who wasn’t here nor there for his kids who now have their own lives & are mad at him. My sister is phenomenal & just gets on with things diplomatically. Me? Not w chance. But, thinking things differently might help me to distance myself from the situation.
5. I just want to feel happier
I’m so lucky to have all the people I do & the support too. Sometimes it overwhelms me & I’d rather shut myself in a quiet room by myself. Christmas Day was fraught with anxiety, stress, panic & anger, purely because of not having alone time or time to chill. The puppy was wired for the 11hrs 23mins I was at my folks’ house. It should’ve been a day of being happy. All I wanted to do was get into bed & be quiet. I will try harder in 2018.
Any confessions from 2017?
My Anxiety Matters 
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Sounds like you tried really hard in 2017! Keep going…
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Thanks so much! I think it’s been hard work 😂 how’s 2017 been for you?
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You are welcome! 2017 has had its ups and downs but it was easier because I’ve learned to accept things are as they are and outside of my control! Here’s to a happy 2018 for all of us!
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If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my life it’s that life is a journey. I keep expecting to “arrive” but I just don’t. Can’t I just get fully cooked and then come out of the oven with a nice ‘ping!’ sound?
Keep seeking. Be gentle with yourself. Don’t give up.
I’m 47 and don’t feel like a grown up yet. I guess that’s okay.
I love Everyday Aspie too – some really great reading there.
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Thank you for your lovely & honest comment. I think we’re in an age where we look for perfection & like you said finding when you’re cooked right 🙂 great reading & following both your blogs! 🙂
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I’ve had several instances of feeling like an adult. It happened in my 20s and 30s a few times. I’m 46 now. The other day when I was driving I thought to myself, “I shouldn’t be driving. I’m just a little girl!” I kept going.
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Definitely! I get those moments. Feels really surreal doesn’t it??
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I really love how honest this post is! x
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Thank you so much ❤️
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I’m enjoying your blog. As someone who shares some of your afflictions, and who has quite a few years on you, I have to say the important things that you are doing right are addressing your issues, confronting them, and actively seeking help in various ways. Even writing about them helps. I let my anxiety take over my life, and really wasted so much. I bow to your bravery!
As for confessions, mine is that I live in my head way too much. Doing far less of that is probably my most important goal of 2018.
Take care!
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